Transformers Armada Side Swipe review

I gotta say, I own a lot of Transformers ever since I started collecting them way back in 2006. I've owned Transformers big and small, Transformers from different sizes, Transformers that turn into vehicles or beasts, Transformers with more articulation than others, and Transformers that come from a plethora of universes. But of all the ones I've owned, none are as crucial to a collection as much as Armada Side Swipe is. This character is the best there is with Transformers fiction, what with his history of being a rookie that wants to impress everyone else as he slowly but surely became a great hero. Makes you wish he was the real protagonist of the series, not Optimus Prime or Hot Shot. This guy is also well-known for having a badass Minicon by his side, especially when it comes to just how devoted he is at taking on the Decepticons. He sadly wasn't around in Energon or Cybertron, which really sucks because he'd either get a new body or keep his classic appearance and help save the day. Oh well, at least he's way better than G1 Sideswipe, Movie Sideswipe, and even RID15 Sideswipe, and I thought that version was badass! Anyways, here's my look at Armada Side Swipe!

Here we have Side Swipe in his gorgeous vehicle mode! Holy shit, this looks absolutely amazing! It's way better than Tracks' altmode, a lot more badass than the DOTM Wreckers, and especially beats Knock Out! The blue is perfect, the other paint apps are gorgeous, and the design of the altmode is perfection! The best part is the color for the windows, which look so cool!

This vehicle mode can be even better with the dragster mode! Flip the back window and press on the button to have an even faster altmode! Awesome! If you look closely, the word "Transformers" is written on top of the windshield; no other Transformer truly represented the brand like Side Swipe has, so why isn't he the real mascot? Move the fuck over, Optimus Prime and Bumblebee!

Transforming this toy is mindblowing! I've never seen a Transformer with this level of engineering until now! The way every piece works in this toy is just mesmerizing, and I really REALLY love how the front windows become hip armor. The hood being part of the forearms? Ingenious! And the Autobot insignia on the chest is pretty cool, especially when it comes to how it leads up to the best robot mode I've ever seen in a Transformer. It looks perfect for a warrior, especially when it comes to just how amazing he is as a character in the series! The front looks great, but the sides and back look awesome, too!

Check out that headsculpt! I love the blue for the visor and the helmet design! It makes him look more like a hero than anyone else from the Armada series, holy shit!

Articulation is badass! Shoulders move front and back, in and out, elbows bend, hips move front and back, in and out, and they bend at the knees in a sideways manner. No other Transformer has done that before!

His Minicon's named Nightbeat, who's the coolest Minicon ever! The motorbike mode's neat and all, but it's the robot mode that counts. Look at how amazing it looks! Suck it, every other Minicon! Also included with Side Swipe are a bayonet and a pistol in the same color as his windows. I don't have those, bu that's okay. Side Swipe's still perfect on his own!

There are a few repaints of this toy, and the coolest part is the fact that they're all Decepticons! This is Universe Oil Slick, a purple repaint that came packaged with some dumbass repaint of a...Best Machinations(?) toy called Blackairachnid(?) now named Crusty Window(?); IDK why Hasbro put that crappy toy with this awesome figure.

Here we have Universe Treadshot with a deco that takes Dead End's deco and wears it a lot better than Dead End did. He has his name, two Decepticon insignias, and a fucking awesome decal on the windows, meaning he should not only lead the Transformers brand as the most important Autobot, but also as the most important Decepticon, too! Megawho? Starwhat? Soundwhere? TREADSHOT, MAN! This guy's Decepticon insignia has the Autobot insignia outline, so maybe he was meant to prove he was a Decepticon at one point in order to be a spy, so he didn't quite make a proper outline for the symbol. Maybe this predated the Oil Slick version of himself, where he has the normal decals when he fooled the Energon Autobots in thinking he is the normal dude before he shows his corrupted form. This figure came with some lame albino Optimus Prime repaint called Ultra Magnum. HASBRO WHO CARES JUST GIVE ME THE AWESOME TREADSHOT OKAY

And finally, Runamuck! This guy gets more than a retooled chest emblem, because he has newer colors, a hot rod engine, a bigger gun, and a new head sculpt! He also has a wicked flame deco and red windows to boot! I don't know if he was meant to be Side Swipe or not, judging by how Cybertron didn't bother making any reference to him, but maybe he was a fully committed Decepticon version of Side Swipe before he redeemed himself to save the Autobots once and for all. But noooooooo, Optimus Prime had to be the one that saved the day. BOOOORRRIIIIINNNNG. This guy came in the Japanese Galaxy Force line with some crappy repaint of Armada Moist called Longrump (boo!), then he came out on his own in the Hasbro line (MERICA!!! FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!), then he came out with some crappy toys that don't deserve to be in the presence of this toy for the Universe 2 line.

Overall, this toy is the best you'll ever get for an awesome Transformer! The modes are perfect and so is the articulation! I was going to recommend getting Runamuck, but you honestly can't beat the originals. No, not that dumb G1 Sideswipe, I mean Armada Side Swipe! I recommend getting him at any price, especially ones that are very expensive.

You see this listing? Get this version of Side Swipe at the price you see! Hell, make an offer where you can pay for it at $100, or $200, or $500, or even $1000!!!! Hell, go past a thousand if you can! What are you waiting for, get this toy PRONTO!!!!!!!!!!

April Fools!